Santa Singh at the Temple
Santa Singh needed some money desperately. Some one told him that if goes and prays at Gurudwara, Mosque, Church and a temple, that his prayers will surely be answered. So Santa goes to a Gurudwara, and prays there. Than he goes to a Mosque and prays there. Than he goes to a church and prays there.Then he goes to a temple. The temple had a large statue. Santa closes his eyes, bows his head, joins his hands
and says his prayer. Santa: Ho Jee tussee itne vadde ho. Itne mahan ho (You are great and you are big). Saannoo 100 rupayen chahiye (I need 100 rupees). Kirpa karo (show your mercy). The priest saw Santa praying. He wanted to help Santa, but knew that a Sikh will never accept the money. So he drops a 100 rupee note, from behind the statue, so that Santa Can not see him. After Santa had said his prayers , and opened his eyes. He saw the note and thought that god has listened to his prayers. He takes the note and goes away. However he is back again next day for money. Now the priest is really annoyed with Santa. Priest is a bit annoyed and decides that he is not going to give any more money to Santa. He changes the big statue with smaller one that day.
Once again Santa goes to the prayer room. However he does not notice the difference. Santa closes his eyes,
bows his head, joins his hands and says his prayer. Santa: Ho Jee tussee itne vadde ho. Itne mahan ho
(You are great and you 2are big). Ajj to saannoo 50 rupayen hi chahiye (I only need 50 rupees today).
Kirpa karo (show your mercy). After that he slowly opens his eyes and does not find any money. Santa: O papa jee tussee itne vadde ho. Itne mahan ho (You are great and you are big). Asee 10 rupayen me hi kaam chala lenge.(I will manage in 10 rupees). Kirpa karo jee. (show your mercy). After that he slowly opens his eyes and does not find any money. He slowly raises his head and now notices that small statue. He carefully looks left and than right, and than slowly moves a bit forward near the statue. Than he whispers to the statue: Oye puttar, Papa kitthon hai (Son, where is your dad)
Cricket life in the heaven
Two fast friends, Santa Singh and Banta Singh, were great cricket fanatics. They decided that whoever dies first will try to come back in the dreams of the other, and tell the other about the Cricket life in the heaven. Santa Singh dies first. One day as Banta was fast sleep, he heard Santa calling him. He was very happy and was eager to know about cricket there. "So, Santa! How is cricket in heaven?" Santa replied, "Hey Banta, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that tomorrow we are going to have a day & night match here in heaven. And the bad news is that you are the opening bowler for tommorrow's match!"
Brain tumor
There's a funeral procession of a sardar going on a busy street. All the sardars in the 'mayyat' are dancing the bhangra and singing and general 'balle balle' is on. The people on the street find it strange that instead of mourning everyone is celebrating as if its a marriage baarat. So one of them asks Santa Singh, "Singh saab, aapka koi sage wala gujar gaya hai aur aap naach raheho?" ..... comes the reply, "Ha ji ! Hai hi baat bade khushi ki !!! Aaj paheli baar ek sardar *brain* tumour se mara hai !!!!"
Test
Two sardarjis were sitting outside a clinic. One of them was crying like anything. So the other asked,"Why are you crying?" The first one replied, "I came here for blood test" Second one asked,"So? Are you afraid?" First one replied,"No, not that. During the blood test they cut my finger" Hearing this the second one started crying.The first one was astonished and asked other, "Why are you crying?" The other replied,"I have come for my urine test."Freedom fighters
Surd Freedom Fighters Once there was a meeting of all the Surd freedom fighters. They were planning for free Punjab. Santa Singh raised a point, "Oh.. we'll get Punjab from India but how would we develop it?" That was a difficult question indeed. Suddenly Banta Singh replied, "No problem! we'll attack USA, it would take over us and then we would be a state of USA and we'll automatically get developed." All the surds became happy on this very simple solution but an old surd did not utter a single word. Someone asked him why he wasn't happy. The surd replied,"OH! THAT'S ALRIGHT BUT..WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF BY CHANCE WE TAKE OVER USA ?????"
Kidnapper
There was a Sardarji who was down on his luck. In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you." The Sardarji then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put Rs100000 in a paper bag & put it beneath the mango tree next to the slide on the north side of the city play ground". Signed, "A Sardarji". The Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents. The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was sitting beneath the mango tree. The Sardarji opened up the bag and found the Rs100000 with a note saying, "How could you do this to a fellow Sardarji ?!"
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